Hi Ladies,

I am so sad and so confused, and am starting to get angry, too ...

I am very confused as to why the Lord would cause such a huge miracle for me in allowing me to go back to take the graduate credits that I needed this summer [to renew my teaching license] via the Dept. of Vocational Rehab.'s assistance, without causing something to come out of it, job wise...

And, I think that I can honestly say that I have never tried harder to search for what I thought was [and may still be] God's will for my life regarding working in some area of teaching school age children in some way. I don't even care if it is a teacher's aide job that I am able to handle physically, if that is the way that the Lord leads me...

And, although I know that God rarely works with our timing, but I happen to know that school in this area starts after Labor Day, and that this is the main time of year when schools, public and Christian alike, are searching for teachers and aides, etc. And, that also includes the Tutoring Centers in the area, as well.

So, I am at a total loss for words, because I just do not understand His ways right now... I have been out of work for over a year now, and really need to find something soon.

Unfortunately, though, I think these involuntary movements [mainly in my jaw, head, and neck], and muscle weakness issues are slowing me down, even though I have never used my walker during an interview. But, I have a feeling that what my Mom has told me recently may be causing me difficulties, too. She has told me a number of times that I am slurring my speech, due to these jaw tics that are pretty much a "constant" in my life, even at night. Even my BSP Free Clinic neurologist [who, mind you is retired from the University of Wisconsin Hospital and Clinics], wrote in his notes somewhere that the jaw tics are "constant". And, yet, there is really nothing that even a neurologist can do to stop them completely.

And, as I stated above, I have even been working with these special "Job counselors" through the Dept. of Vocational Rehabilitation [DVR] to try to get a job that I can handle.

And, since I was able to handle working so hard during my summer grad. classes, I thought that maybe I could find work in the teachiing field again, as there are many ways that teachers can find to sit down with elementary school students, in particular ...

You see, I have received at least 4 email "Dear ________ notes", and the Christian school job fell through, too.

I kind of just feel like I want to curl up in a ball on my bed and cry for days, or just to get out of this mess of a world [I have thought of wanting to be with Jesus, but no, I could NEVER do that to my family]...

For goodness sake, it isn't as if I am a new graduate from some university or something. I have 4.5 years of teaching experience and 2.5 years of being a para-educator [teacher's aide] prior to my teaching in the Houston area.

So, I am wondering what in the world is wrong with me? I may be a bit "soft spoken", but my own 5th grade teacher, of whom I am very good friends with even now [and sister in Christ, too ] is an extremely soft spoken lady, too.

I am really struggling with all of this stuff right now, if you haven't already figured that out by now. I do NOT want to get upset with God, yet I find myself feeling that way sometimes... getting into the "Why God??" stuff...

Please pray that the Lord will help me get through this terribly tough time that I am going through ...

I thought it was hard enough just to still be grieving for my Dad...

In Christ's Love,

Jennifer

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Sparki2003,

Jennifer, does your area have a web site for the schools where you can post your application and/or view daily job openings? I know here they do have that resource. Maybe something will show up after Labor Day as the schools assess their needs. That also happens all the time around here.
Also, do you have scads of charter schools around like we do here? I know you have looked into private schools or Christian schools but are there any school systems or schools you're missing or bypassing? Even a neighboring town or something?
He's definitely saying wait to you and there must be some kind of door opening somewhere, but I wonder if it is through some kind of different avenue than you have looked at.
There's a definite teacher shortage out here, so most people I know have found jobs right away (and just about every person I know is a teacher it seems!).
You're valuable to Him and to your profession, but maybe just need to pray for some new ideas or places to apply?
I wouldnt even dwell on any physical situations you are dealing with.


***Lord, I pray that you will show Jennifer open doors and places to apply for work which she may not have thought of yet. I pray you will supply ideas and place her in the perfect place, where she can not only do the work you called her to, but serve others and reflect Your glory.
Please comfort her, and help her find a place for this new school year.
In Jesus name.

Praying for you Jennifer,have you considered private tutoring ,when my daughter was hurt in a car accident we had a private tutor for a long time.
She has a tutor for her girls if they get behind,maybe you could ask it might be good so they could see your abilities.

Jennifer,

I can totally relate to your feelings! It's the same thing I felt over 25 years ago when I was looking for a teaching job out of college. I just couldn't understand why God would make a way for me to get a college degree with a teaching certification and then not get hired! And to top things off I was being told by everyone(news media included) that there was a teacher shortage. (Where??)

I did finally get a teacher's assistant's job and did that for 5 years while going back to school to work on my masters degree in Early Childhood Education. And then....I STILL COULDN'T FIND A JOB!!! and was even told I didn't have "experience" WHAT!!! None of it made sense.

I worked in a preschool and later as a substitute until I was finally hired for an interim position. That led to me being hired for a full time position where I've been as I said for over 25 years.

Why am I telling you this? I SO want to encourage you to continue in your search for a teaching position and especially continue in your faith that God has something in mind for you. I know from reading your comments on other posts that you believe this.

With all that said let me add a suggestion to maybe inquire about volunteering and/or substituting at the schools where you've applied. That way the principals can at least see you in action. I don't know all of your situation or how things work in your area but maybe you can use these suggestions.

Don't give up! You can do this!

Lord, give Jennifer a clear mind to focus on what You would have her do. Let her thoughts be covered by Your thoughts and lead her to those who can and will encourage her. If it's Your will, allow a position to become available for her in the place You want her to be. I pray in Jesus name. Amen

Grace & Peace to you,
Kay

Hi Ladies,

I've had 2 interviews, and put out many, many apps online, and off, for school related positions [teacher/aide/after school aide, etc], and still no results. And, you bet your socks off that all of this stuff has
me in a tizzy, emotionally, etc., etc.

But, I know that I need to keep putting my faith in our Lord, as He is the Only One who really knows where He wants me to work, even if
it is 'out of my field'... Please pray that I will stay strong through HIS STRENGTH, because mine is GONE ! And, now that the school year
has started up here, it is gonna be even harder...

However, there is still one 1st grade teaching position that was just put up on 8/28/08, and I called there and they have not started
interviews yet [12-15 miles south of here]. And, there is one after-school aide position in Janesville that would not start for
approximately 2 weeks that has not been filled yet. And, I am going to try to call this other place to check to see if they hired anyone yet again tomorrow [as I think I called during lunch time] in a city that is about 80 miles from here, but it is for a 5th grade job, I believe.

But, as usual, I still only want the job that God wants me to have... His will and not my own!

However, my Mom was starting to get on my case about my walker again tonight, and reminding me just how much I don't need it, and that I really just need to "get a job", and that this other lady's kid is also a teacher, but had to take a job at Fr*to Lay, Inc., where she has to walk her legs off all day long... which was why the walker problem came up again, because I told her that "I could not do that kind of a job." And, although I think part of my Mom knows the truth about that situation, but the other part of her is like me and wants for me to "get a job". [But, I personally add in
"get a job that I can handle/and that God wants me to have"...]

And, I figure if some school, or other place doesn't mind having me work for them, disabilities and all, and it sounds
"reasonable to me", then, I am going to take it as the Lord's way of telling me, "Yes", and that He will be there helping me all along the way; moment by moment, and day by day.... As, that is what He has been doing with me for the past year or so.

However, I do feel much more "ready" to work since I made it through those intense summer school courses to renew my teaching license.

Could you please pray about this situation, too? I have been waking up every day with major back and/or neck spasms due to the night time involuntary head/neck movements [tics] lately.

I would really appreciate your continued prayers for my job search, and for my peace of mind, and for me to remember that our Lord Jesus really IS with me during this tough time...

In Christ's Love,

Jennifer

P.s. To answer Emmab's question: Yes, I have searched everywhere, many sites online, something called Jobnet, 3 specific teacher/aide position websites that are updated daily, and searched the ACSI website for Christian schools in Wisconsin, etc. And, I've been searching all around the state of Wisconsin...

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Sparki2003,

Jennifer, please keep us posted and we will pray God gives you the right thing in the right place! I have been praying about something similar myself lately, wondering why one thing happened and then nothing happened, and long story short today things finally took a turn for the better.
I think I asked God why, about a thousand times first and then realized I was making things up in my head and they didnt need to be there.
I hope and pray He opens the perfect door for you, and you can sail on through it.
And I believe if they need you, they need you and that will be it.
My very good friend is a special ed teacher with severe rheumatoid arthritis, and she hasnt had one problem getting or keeping her job.
I know God can make it all work out (for the good for sure!).
We'll be waiting to hear........

Hi there,

Well, as of right now, I am pretty sure that there are 5 teacher's aide possibilities [two being 12-15 hrs/wk - blah!] and three being 25+ hours/week.

One of them would force me to move away from this city, as it would be too far to drive back and forth from every day with gas prices being so rotten. [But, that one is a 30+ hr/wk job, and would pay $12.50/hr, which is the best I've heard of around this area for a teacher's aide in a long time.]

However, I pray that the Lord would show whomever He has chosen for me to work for that they need to give me a chance to interview with them [and that it would be a place where I am able to do the work and enjoy it] very soon...

And, if you wouldn't mind, please pray for me, as depression and fear have been creeping into my mind very easily in these past few days. And, it hasn't been easy for me not to want to simply "give up", as I've been getting many rejection e-mails in the past week or so.

And, yet, I have sincerely confessed to the Lord my unbelief at least once a day, and have asked Him to please help me to overcome it, but this is a frightening time for me.

I really need to find work, and yet, I know deep down inside of my heart that the Lord is working out my "Jeremiah 29:11-13" for me as I write this here right now.

In Christ's loving care,

Jennifer

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Sparki2003,

Prayers being sent!
Many blessings!

Jennifer, any news yet?

Hi Ladies,

Yes, I have a bit of news for Y'all...

I have an interview in the morning [Mon] for one of 6 possible after school tutoring positions at a school here in town. It isn't many hours [12.5/week], but that is better than what I have now.

But, I'm wondering if the Lord is trying to tell me that He wants me to go back to work at a slower pace than I'd like to go myself ???

I haven't heard anything from the other aide openings in the area yet, so please pray that maybe the Lord will allow me to try out this new avenue in the teaching field.... Thanks


In Christ's Love,


Jennifer

Thank you for your prayers!

I think the interview went well, but only God knows this for sure. All that I know is that this particular job felt like a "really good fit" for me right now.

However, I should know something by this coming Thursday. I really do want to follow God's will, but, at this point in time, in the "teaching field", and the options, even for teacher's aides are running out.

I would appreciate your continued prayers.

Love, in Christ Jesus,

Jennifer

Hi, sorry I didnt get back yesterday because I meant to.
Praying God will open the right door!
In His perfect time!
Keep us posted,
blessings........

Hi Ladies,

God has created another after school program opening and I have been invited to go there for an interview TODAY at 12 noon Central time. I would appreciate your prayers greatly.

And, I am continuing to pray for God's will to be done in my job search, as well as the rest of my life.

I am praying that the Lord will give me the "correct" words to use to answer the[se] interviewer[s] questions, and that He would help them be accepting of the jaw tics, etc. that I have. You see, these involuntary movements in my jaw are pretty much "constant" [including night time], and sometimes have even caused me to slur my words when I get nervous, etc. And, for obvious reasons, job interviews tend to make me nervous. However, I have finally been given permission from my Job Coaches to tell the interviewers about them before interviews now, as they tend to make it appear that I am just "chewing gum", and, that is an obviously NON-acceptable thing to do during an interview.

Thank y'all once again!

Love, in Christ Jesus,

Jennifer

Lord, we just ask you to be present before and during this interview, giving Jennifer all the right words to say and the calmness she will need to get through it.
We ask you to open the exact right door for her, so there is no question as to what you want her to do.
We know you let everything pass through your hands of love, and we trust you with the outcome whatever it may be.
Please keep her in your care, even down to the last detail today.
In Jesus name.
Amen.

Awaiting news??????

I wish I had more news to share with Y'all. However, the only thing that I know right now is that when I talked to this particular principal on Friday afternoon [10/17/08], she told me that "they were still working through the hiring process". So, I'm not quite sure what that means, except that at least I am not "out of the running," quite yet.

Another possible job opening just popped up late last week. It is for a school district about an hour or so east of my hometown, and it is actually for an elementary school teacher, which is amazing at this point in the school year. However, the posting stated that the opening came about "due to a surplus of students". Hmm... What an unusual concept...

So, I've been working on their application on and off all weekend long. And, the hardest part is the portion where they require you to tell about "your philosophy of teaching and how you would implement it" in a classroom.

Thankfully, I already have my philosophy like that written out, which is awesome, but I am still working on writing out how I used to use it in my former classrooms. And, of course, I know how I did that in my mind, but putting it down on paper has proven to be much more difficult than I thought that it would be. So, please pray that the Lord will give me the words to finish this part of the application.

Thank you!

In Christ's Love,

Jennifer

Hi there,

I just received this update in my e-mail box, regarding the position that I interviewed for last week... And, it was for an after school program for 15 hrs./week.

Lord God, I do not understand this decision that they have made... But, all that I know for sure is that I did my best, and that's all I can do during interviews ... Lord, please help me to find the position for which you have made ready for me, soon, please. Although, I know that these things go by Your timing, and not my own... Please help me, Lord Jesus !

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thank you for your interest in the School District of J!

This is to inform you the above position has been filled. Please continue to check the website for additional vacancies which may be of interest to you. Thank you!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, and the other teacher's aide positions were filled by others, as well...


In Christ's Love,

Jennifer

I am praying that you will be guided by God.

Hi Ladies,

I still do not know exactly what the Lord is trying to do in my life, job wise, specifically.

And, I've had several serious "chats with God" about all of these rejection letters and calls after interviews, [especially the ones who call and tell me that "You did a very good job, but we filled the position with someone else kinds of calls], but He must not think the jobs are 'quite right' for me, in some way???

But, the Dept. of Vocational Rehab.[DVR] lady told me that I needed to go ahead and start signing up to substitute teach in area school districts now. And, to apply for long term sub. jobs if they are within local driving distance, if they become available. At least this way, I can earn a bit of $$, anyways ...

Actually, I really do not know what my Lord thinks, but I know that He is a good God, and wants what is best for me. Jeremiah 29:11-13, Isaiah 41:10, and 1st Corinthians 2:9-10... And, I plan to do my best to keep "fighting the good fight of faith".

I would appreciate your continued prayers. Mainly, that I don't "give up" on the Lord's promises...

It is so hard to persevere in all of this, and has been so long since I've been allowed to work with school aged children [last school year I couldn't, because my Wisconsin teaching license had expired]... I guess I would rather have something more "stable" than sub teaching, but maybe He knows something that I do not know...

And, sorry early childhood daycare, pre-school educators; I've been there and done that, many times, and for some reason, I just did not care for doing that at all.

So, for now, I guess sub teaching is "in" for me, when/if I get called to do so...

Love in Christ Jesus, my Comforter and my Provider,

Jennifer